परदेसियों से न अँखिया मिलाना

Pardesiyon se na ankhiya milaana

Don't go falling in love with outsiders!


This is the title of a famous song from the film Jab Jab Phool Khile (1965) and showcases a much repeated piece of Bollywood advice: Don't go falling in love with foreigners. In this film, Raja (Shashi Kapoor) is a poor, humble and innocent boatman in Kashmir who falls in love with the smart, city-slicker Rita (Nanda). Predictably, the city-girl is not about to move into some Kashmiri village and be a wife to the boatman, and so Raja's hopes are dashed. In an odd case of reel-time pre-emption, Raja sings this song "Pardesiyon se na akhiyaan milaana; Pardesiyon ko hai ik din jaana" (Don't go falling in love with outsiders, for they have to leave some day) and then promptly disregards his own words of wisdom.

This is, however, a true Bollywood film. And so no broken-hearted heroes allowed. While providing the viewer (and the protagonist) with a reasonable bit of advice, this movie of course perpetuates this legendary urban-rural pairing. So Rita eventually comes around and recognizes the innocent beauty of Raja's heart. Other complications follow, but in the end, the lovers are united. One can only surmise that the loving couple may have had quite a tough time getting used to each other's ways...but hey, it's the movies!

Tadka Dal

Don't mess with people who won't be able to spend forever and after with you (or be prepared to move to alien locales yourself).

The Source

Bollywood is rife with tales of city boys whisking off their tribal lady loves from hill-sides and waterfalls, or uptown girls turning into rural belles to be with their bucolic beaux. This modern myth is quite prevalent in some quarters of Indian society. The ancient tale of Shakuntala and Dushyanta is probably the earliest examples of a city-slicker paired with a woman of the woods.This romance is found in the Mahabharata, but is most famous as the plot of Kalidaasa's ancient Sanskrit play Abhijnaanashakuntalam. In this tale, the beautiful Shakuntala (daughter of sage Vishvamitra and the demigoddess Menaka) falls in love with King Dushyanta. Shakuntala, who lives an idyllic life in a forest with her girlfriends and some friendly deer, hooks up with King Dushyanta who is lost during a hunting trip. The King promises to make her his queen. Trials and tribulations ensue, but the story ends with a somewhat-happy turn of events.